Where the Rose Is Made of Gold
by VerdeAmor
Summary: Shawn screwed up long ago, now the only thing that can save him and the WWE universe is an Extreme Enigma breaking the spell. A look at if WWE was taken over by Beauty and the Beast. T for language.
1. HUNTER! KILL IT!

**Heh heh heh. Don't hate me. This is probably the most messed up crossover I've ever imagined, but so what? I'm still writing..er...typing away. **

I STILL DON'T OWN ANYTHING!

* * *

Once upon a time, there was a very sexy Prince who lived in a shining Castle. Although he had everything his heart desired, the Prince thought he was too sexy for everyone in the castle to care about them.

One stormy night, an old whiny beggar woman arrived at the castle.

The Prince opened the door, and she said, "Shawn Micheals, can I stay for one night in exchang-!!!"

"WHAT IN THE NAME OF PUPPIES IS THAT?!" The Prince screamed, "HUNTER! KILL IT!"

At that moment, the beggar woman turned into Vicky Guererro which only made the Prince scream louder and run for cover.

Vicky, needless to say, was not amused with the Heartbreak Kid's rudeness. "For that disrespect, you'll have to-"

"Whatever you want just don't touch the face!" he screamed, cowering under a coffee table.

"EXCUSE ME!!! I WASN'T FINISHED!" the castle shook in Vicky's rage. "As I was saying, for being a rude little moron I'm turning you into a beast."

Shawn got out from under the table, "Whoa whoa whoa, Ya can't just come into my house and turn me into some animal! Who do you think I am, Batista?!"

"No, but-"

"Then this whole Beast thing is a little pointless. Here, take a gift basket with all the DX merchandise you can get at /SHOP and have a nice day." He politely escorted her to the door.

"Oh, thank you Shawn! But I can't let you just give me things! Here's a present for you!" she turned around ominously and muttered the magical spell, "Excuse me, But now it's time to REST…IN...PEACE."

The Heartbreak Kid looked at her quizzically, than fell onto one knee in agonizing pain, his eyes rolling into the back of his head. He bellowed as he grew 9 inches and 75 lbs, his gorgeous blonde hair turning as black as the storm surrounding the castle

"I hate DX, and why in the hell were you advertising in a story!?" Vicky cast another spell over his castle, as the entirety of his friends and family disappeared into nothingness.

"You can be normal again when you can prove that you actually like someone else that's not Hunter." she turned to march out of the castle, when she faced him again and said, "Oh, and you can have this thing I was going to give you for your trouble." She brought forth the World Wrestling Federation belt which he grasped onto like a drowning sailor. "The second you lose this, you have to stay like that forever." She walked out with a self- satisfied smirk on her face. 


	2. With a CD Playa

**Thanks for the reviews! \m/,**

**Still own nothing, If I owned anything, why would I be writing fanfiction hrmmm?!**

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It was many years later that a 32 year old Jeff Hardy was walking into town with a messenger bag over his shoulder, his headphones sticking out of a Walkman CD player as Marilyn Manson groaned raspy lyrics into his inner ear.

With a disappointed sigh, he watched the townspeople go about their daily business without as much as a single change from yesterday. Dolph Ziggler was flirting with Maria, there's Punk by the pawn shop trying to steal gold from everyone else, and once again the Divas would mutter about the weird kid with too many hair colors.

He escaped into the music store, run by General Manager Teddy Long. "Yo, playa."

"Hey Teddy. I'm just returning this CD." He pulled the Manson CD out of the Walkman and handed it back. "Got anything new?"

"Naw, not since Scott gave the store a few yesterday."

"No problem, man. I'll take that Pearl Jam one again." He pulled 'Ten' off the shelf and stuffed it into the CD player.

"Again? You've borrowed it twice."

"Hell, it ain't bad. Plus Big Bro can't take much of it anyway." He chuckled, stowing the CD in his bag.

"Just take it, playa. We've got doubles anyhow."

Jeff shrugged, "Thanks Teddy. See ya around."

* * *

Edge had once again beaten Santino in the middle of town with a devastating spear. He looked triumphantly at the gathering crowd, all in awe of him.

"Wow, Edge, you're the greatest wrestler who ever lived!" his nephew-in-law shouted as he handed Edge a towel.

"Thank you, it's nice to be appreciated for once!" he wiped his face off quickly, then turned his attention to the nearly unnoticed Hardy boy leaving town.

"Hold on, Pedro." He said, ignoring the Mexican's protests of incorrect name use. "Hey Jeff."

Jeff rolled his eyes, praying for patience. "Hello Edge."

"How about you come down to my cabin, and we can watch Decade of Decadence together? Ya know, a little bonding time with my favorite high-flier?" he gave a trademark grin that nearly made Jeff wish he was bulimic.

"Yeah, well ya see I gotta go help Matt..." He stated quite slowly.

"That pathetic excuse of an ECW Champion?" Edge scoffed, "Who's he defending his title against, Jimmy Wang Yang?" both he and Chavo burst into laughter.

"HEY. Don't talk about my brother like that!" he yelled.

"Dammit Chavo! What'd I say about talking about Jeff's brother?" Chavo silently protested his unrighteous punishment.

"And he beat DREAMER for that belt! Pay a little bit of respect!" he turned quickly and walked away.

Matt was in the basement of their shared house, where they kept a ring just for practice. "I've had it with this damned move!" he yelled, noticing Jeff had entered from the stairs. "That's it! We'll never get that stupid twisty move down!"

"Don't say that, man." Jeff consoled, "We've just gotta try something different."

The elder Hardy sighed, "Alright, help me out then. Bend over."

Jeff snickered, "That's what she said."

Matt placed Jeff in a reverse headlock, and twisted so his younger brother hit the mat face first.

The younger Hardy rolled on the mat, his face on fire and a triumphant grin on his lips, "Dammit bro, ya did it!"


End file.
